{"id":78703,"date":"2025-02-09T22:54:06","date_gmt":"2025-02-09T22:54:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/peraltafinancing.com\/advertising\/paragraphs-from-the-edge-gods-of-advertising\/"},"modified":"2025-02-09T22:54:06","modified_gmt":"2025-02-09T22:54:06","slug":"paragraphs-from-the-edge-gods-of-advertising","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fivemor.com\/?p=78703","title":{"rendered":"Paragraphs from the Edge | Gods of Advertising"},"content":{"rendered":"<p> <br \/>\n<\/p>\n<div id=\"post-13621\">\n<p><h2>Paragraphs from the\u00a0Edge<\/h2>\n<h3>February 13, 2021<\/h3>\n<\/p>\n<div class=\"entrybody\">\n<p><strong>ONE<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>\u201cHi sweetie!\u201d your mom warbles. Abruptly, she asks you to hold on while she adjusts her hearing aids. A clattering of noises the dog yipping and she\u2019s back. \u201cSorry about that!\u201d Like always, her voice wavered between desperate and defiant. \u201cThese new hearing aids are supposed to fit my ears but they keep falling out.\u201d She\u2019s having a rough week, dealing with health issues, a sick dog, and the even sicker tenants at her assisted living facility. The theme was incontinence, to one degree or another. In the process of telling you about an old man who peed his pants in the elevator the call drops. Maybe she inadvertently pushed the wrong button. When she calls you back you do not ask her to repeat the story. You got the gist of it. Getting old sucked. Twenty-five years her junior and you were experiencing it for yourself. Bad eyes. Trick back. Chronic Indigestion. How long before either of you are pissing on elevators?<\/p>\n<p><strong>TWO<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>A chubby kid, you had no choice but to accept lesser status among your peers. It was the price of entry. Still, you once considered David your best friend. Sometimes he treated you shoddily. Other times he was nice. You were like his overweight girlfriend; he only hung out with you when no one else was around. You hated this injustice but you believed in the friendship. Underneath the bullshit you were certain David liked you. Came a morning you rapped on his door. You knew he was there. His bike was on the porch. But it was his mother who answered. Is Dave home, you asked? She replied he\u2019d gone to the movies. It was a lie. You could hear him telling her to get rid of you. After that, things were never the same and the same hadn\u2019t been that great in the first place.<\/p>\n<p><span id=\"wordads-inline-marker\" style=\"display: none;\"><\/span>\t\t\t<\/p><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Paragraphs from the\u00a0Edge February 13, 2021 ONE \u201cHi sweetie!\u201d your mom warbles. Abruptly, she asks you to hold on while she adjusts her hearing aids. A clattering of noises the dog yipping and she\u2019s back. \u201cSorry about that!\u201d Like always, her voice wavered between desperate and defiant. \u201cThese new hearing aids are supposed to fit [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4302,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[12023],"tags":[8397,5362,5548,39852],"dealstore":[],"offerexpiration":[],"class_list":["post-78703","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advertising","tag-advertising","tag-edge","tag-gods","tag-paragraphs"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Paragraphs from the Edge | Gods of Advertising - Som2ny Network<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/fivemor.com\/?p=78703\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Paragraphs from the Edge | Gods of Advertising - Som2ny Network\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Paragraphs from the\u00a0Edge February 13, 2021 ONE \u201cHi sweetie!\u201d your mom warbles. 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