{"id":7072664,"date":"2026-10-02T09:07:53","date_gmt":"2026-10-02T09:07:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/fivemor.com\/?p=7072664"},"modified":"2026-10-02T09:07:53","modified_gmt":"2026-10-02T09:07:53","slug":"lead-with-questions-not-always","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fivemor.com\/?p=7072664","title":{"rendered":"Lead with questions? Not always"},"content":{"rendered":"


\n<\/p>\n

\n

I see it everywhere: <\/span>\u201cGreat leaders lead with questions.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\n

Asking questions is appropriate in some situations, but not in all. Effective leaders know when to ask questions, when to give direction, and when to step back and delegate.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

For the past 30 years, I have preached and taught that leaders use three leadership styles: <\/span>directing, discussing and delegating<\/span><\/i>. The key is knowing when to use each.<\/span><\/p>\n

The discussing style: Lead with questions<\/h2>\n

You ask questions and use dialogue to elicit people\u2019s ideas, insights and expertise. Use it when:<\/span><\/p>\n

    \n
  • The problem is complex or ambiguous. When there is no obvious answer, discussion can lead to a better understanding of the situation and to possible solutions.<\/span><\/li>\n
  • People have valuable knowledge or experience to share. Those closest to the work often see problems and opportunities that leaders may overlook.<\/span><\/li>\n
  • Buy-in matters. Participation gives people a voice and strengthens their commitment to the decision.<\/span><\/li>\n
  • Creativity is essential. Discussion and brainstorming can generate ideas and perspectives that might otherwise be overlooked.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

    In these situations, people want to be heard, contribute their ideas and have a voice in shaping the decision.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

    When you use the discussing style, people learn to listen, analyze situations, collaborate, ask questions and express their ideas. They also learn to support their recommendations with examples, evidence and data.<\/span><\/p>\n

    The discussing style can be misused when leaders continue the discussion after sufficient information is available to make a decision. This can lead to long, unproductive meetings, frustration and decision paralysis. The goal of discussion is not discussion itself. It is to improve decision quality and build ownership.<\/span><\/p>\n

    The directing style: Lead by telling and showing<\/h2>\n

    Sometimes people don\u2019t need questions. They need direction instead.<\/span><\/p>\n

    When using the directing style, you tell people what to do and how to do it.<\/span><\/p>\n

    Use the directing style when:<\/span><\/p>\n

      \n
    • The task is urgent. A decision cannot wait. Crises, safety issues and turnarounds require immediate direction.\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n
    • People lack skills or experience. Roles or expectations are unclear.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n
    • Performance has declined. When goals and deadlines are not met, you may need to set expectations, monitor progress and provide immediate feedback.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n
    • A new strategy or major change is being introduced. Early implementation often requires more guidance until people understand the new process.\u00a0<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

      In these situations, people need clear direction on how to proceed.<\/span><\/p>\n

      When you use the directing style, people learn to listen, ask questions, follow instructions and meet deadlines.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      Overuse of the directing style leads to micromanagement, which frustrates and demotivates employees.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      The delegating style: Lead by empowering people<\/h2>\n

      When people have the necessary skills, experience and confidence, they don\u2019t need detailed direction. They know what needs to be done and can solve problems as they arise. They need autonomy to make decisions, trust to do the work and accountability for the results.<\/span><\/p>\n

      When using a delegating style, you clarify the desired outcome, expectations and due date, but leave the \u201chow\u201d to the individual. For larger or more complex projects, set check-in points to monitor progress, provide support as needed and keep the work on track.<\/span><\/p>\n

      Delegation stretches people, builds their capabilities and frees leaders to focus on more strategic priorities.<\/span><\/p>\n

      When you delegate effectively, people learn to manage their time, develop plans, solve problems, influence others and overcome obstacles. Effective delegation also builds confidence and accountability.<\/span><\/p>\n

      The delegating style can be misused when people are given responsibility before they are ready. Assigning tasks to those who lack the skills or experience to handle them can set them up for failure. In those situations, a more directing or discussing style may be appropriate.<\/span><\/p>\n

      Each leadership style is appropriate and effective in certain situations.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

      The same person may require different leadership styles depending on the situation.<\/span><\/p>\n

      Maria is highly capable of managing the department\u2019s budget, so the leader delegates that responsibility. However, she is inexperienced with a new regulatory requirement, so the leader uses the discussing style. During an immediate compliance problem, the leader may temporarily use the directing style.<\/span><\/p>\n

      Problems arise when leaders rely too heavily on a single style and apply it in every situation.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      Be adaptable<\/h2>\n

      My father had a simple rule whenever I drove in bad weather: Adjust to existing conditions. That principle applies to leadership.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      Asking questions isn\u2019t always the best approach. Some situations require precise directions, while others require delegation.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      The right leadership style helps people achieve today\u2019s goals while developing the skills and confidence they need for tomorrow.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      And finally, be prepared to adjust your style when conditions change.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

      I see it everywhere: \u201cGreat leaders lead with questions.\u201d Asking questions is appropriate in some situations, but not in all. Effective leaders know when to ask questions, when to give direction, and when to step back and delegate.\u00a0 For the past 30 years, I have preached and taught that leaders use three leadership styles: directing, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":7072665,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[124535,99082,233494,233495,12280,202152,233496],"tags":[212485,41925,39849,4086,129436,233497,6855],"dealstore":[],"offerexpiration":[],"class_list":["post-7072664","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-delegating","category-development","category-directing","category-discussing","category-leadership","category-leadership-styles","category-paul-b-thornton","tag-delegating","tag-directing","tag-discussing","tag-lead","tag-leadership-styles","tag-paul-b-thornton","tag-questions"],"yoast_head":"\nLead with questions? Not always - Som2ny Network<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/fivemor.com\/?p=7072664\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Lead with questions? Not always - Som2ny Network\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I see it everywhere: \u201cGreat leaders lead with questions.\u201d Asking questions is appropriate in some situations, but not in all. 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