I am still coming in terms of loving myself instead of being too hard on myself, especially on days when I crave emotional support or the fact that you have come a long, long way, Parika. I often fail to accept that I have been through a lot lately, and I need to let the emotions pass by, grieve through my trauma and live life one day at a time because that\u2019s what kind of keeps me going. Tears dont stop; feeling alone doesn\u2019t fade away that easily, but all I know is at the end of the day, it\u2019s you. It is only you who has to make sure that you\u2019re okay. It is you who has to decide to keep going. It\u2019s okay if you are scared, tired or unsure; you need to believe in yourself that you got this because you\u00a0matter.<\/p>\n
I have turned my pain into power, my sadness into strength, and my wounds into wisdom because, for me, that is a survivor\u2019s life. And one thing is definitely sure: it is what it is, and life goes on, my darling, no matter what. Another thing that I learned from my healing journey is to remember who you are; remember the days when you thought you wouldn\u2019t, but you made it through, so you will make it through this time, too. Sometimes, it\u2019s all about one breath at a time. And I will be honest, \u201cpain and healing are never easy, but you and your story are always worth\u00a0it.\u201d<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n Currently, I don\u2019t know how I feel. One minute, I am healing; the next, I am questioning my self-worth. One minute, I am happy; the next, I am crying and struggling to hold it all together, but one thing I know that keeps me going is that I trust the process. It is like a bird sitting on a tree, which is never afraid of the branch breaking because its trust is not in the branch but in its wings. And I am that\u00a0bird.<\/p>\n I won\u2019t deny that trauma breaks you to the core, and it\u2019s hard to see yourself happy. I am struggling with this right now, and I hope one day I overcome this fear of \u201cforeboding joy.\u201d I hope so because I am tired of crying or questioning my existence. I am on a healing journey of loving myself and grieving over the life event I had and letting it take its course of time and see what life unfolds next. Because I believe what Yung Pueblo said, \u201cI didn\u2019t put so much energy into healing to be happy all the time. I know it\u2019s not realistic. I do so because I can face the down moments with more ease and the fact that nothing lasts forever.\u201d <\/em>And all I know is you dont always have to find a silver lining; you just need to keep\u00a0going.<\/p>\n As one of my Twitter friends wrote, \u201cYour trauma didn\u2019t make you stronger; you chose to do the work to overcome your trauma and heal. <\/em>YOU<\/em><\/strong> are the reason you are stronger\u201d<\/em>, and I guess this is true in my case too. Your feelings are worth validating, and your hurt is worth recognising. Be there for yourself and let yourself feel because letting yourself feel is how you heal. Currently, I am healing, surviving, and trying to love myself because, in the end, you need you more than they need you; remember\u00a0this.<\/p>\n Ending this heartfelt blog with beautiful lines written by one of my favourite authors that resonate with me to the core\u00a0–<\/p>\n In this world, choosing authenticity and worthiness is an absolute act of resistance. Choosing to live and love with our whole hearts is an act of defiance. You are going to confuse, piss off and terrify lots of people, including yourself. One minute, you\u2019ll pray that the transformation stops, and the next minute, you\u2019ll pray that it never ends. You\u2019ll also wonder how you can feel so brave and so afraid at the same time. At least, that\u2019s how I feel most of the time\u2026brave, afraid and very, very\u00a0alive.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n – Bren\u00e9 Brown, Rising Strong: The Reckoning The Rumble. The Revolution.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n You got this, Sending you lots of love, positivity and hope\u00a0\u2764<\/p>\n Hello, long time no see. I have been away from writing because I didn\u2019t get the courage to say or articulate what I am feeling or going through. But then today, I gathered all the courage to talk about how a trauma survivor feels or the idea that it is okay to be numb after […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[226312,226313,210480,100389,133022],"tags":[59618],"dealstore":[],"offerexpiration":[],"class_list":["post-7064703","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-believe-in-yourself","category-healing-from-trauma","category-healing-journey-2","category-mental-health-2","category-survivor","tag-saviour"],"yoast_head":"\n
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