{"id":7053780,"date":"2026-09-01T11:19:31","date_gmt":"2026-09-01T11:19:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/peraltafinancing.com\/uncategorized\/five-parenting-insights-i-wish-id-learned-earlier-jessica-speer\/"},"modified":"2026-09-01T11:19:31","modified_gmt":"2026-09-01T11:19:31","slug":"five-parenting-insights-i-wish-id-learned-earlier-jessica-speer","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fivemor.com\/?p=7053780","title":{"rendered":"Five Parenting Insights I Wish I\u2019d Learned Earlier \u2013 Jessica Speer"},"content":{"rendered":"


\n<\/p>\n

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This post shares five parenting insights I learned while raising my kids, which prompted my personal growth and made me a better parent. <\/em><\/p>\n

And just like that, my oldest daughter is about to graduate from high school. The past 18 years have been a winding journey of laughs, tears, struggles, triumphs, and so much more. I wouldn\u2019t trade the experience for anything.<\/p>\n

Like most parents, I learned how to raise kids on the job. My upbringing, education, and instincts came into play, but nothing fully prepared me to raise children. Instead, I learned through trial and error, connecting with other parents and resources, and much reflection.\u00a0 Being a parent inspired my personal growth<\/a> in so many ways. <\/p>\n

Some days, I felt like a good parent. Other days, not so much. Looking back, I realize there are insights I wish I\u2018d learned earlier.<\/a> Once I put these insights into practice, they supported my daughter\u2019s well-being and growth (and mine, too). They even inspired me to begin researching and writing books<\/a>. Here are five parenting insights I wish I\u2019d learned right from the start.\u00a0<\/p>\n

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\"Text:<\/figure>\n<\/div>\n

Five Parenting Insights I Wish I\u2019d Learned Earlier<\/strong><\/h2>\n
    \n
  1. Listen more, talk less <\/strong>\u00a0(especially during the preteen and teen years)<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    As parents, it\u2019s hard to see our kids struggle. The caregiver\u2019s instinct to jump into problem-solving<\/a> and advice-giving is intense. Sometime along the way, I learned to quiet this instinct and focus on listening instead.\u00a0<\/p>\n

    To be heard,<\/a> validated, and understood by another human<\/a> is healing. It also builds trust. When kids and teens share their thoughts, feelings, and experiences, they begin to make sense of them. Often, simply processing out loud helped my daughter find her path. These moments also strengthen her confidence in herself to navigate problems.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

      \n
    1. Remember the importance of repair\u00a0<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

      Like all parents, I messed up sometimes<\/a>. I forgot to listen and jumped right to giving advice. Sometimes, I didn\u2019t acknowledge and validate my daughters\u2019 emotions. Other times, I reacted carelessly instead of responding thoughtfully.\u00a0<\/p>\n

      Luckily, I learned about the importance of repair. When I humbly acknowledge my mistakes and apologize, I\u2019m working to reconnect. Instead of avoiding uncomfortable conversations, I try to own my missteps and learn from them. <\/a>These conversations remind my kids that we are all human and that they can come to me when they make a mistake, too.<\/p>\n

        \n
      1. Worry less<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

        I\u2019m a worrier by nature, so this is tough for me. My brain quickly jumps to worst-case scenarios <\/a>at the slightest hint of threat or harm. Over the years, I\u2019ve been working on this tendency so I don\u2019t pass it on to my kids.\u00a0<\/p>\n

        When my kids bravely put themselves out there or try something new,<\/a> I try to replace my \u201cbe careful\u201d with \u201cyou got this.\u201d This vote of confidence boosts their confidence in themselves.\u00a0<\/p>\n

        I still regularly talk to my teens about safety, but then I try to let my worries go and remember this quote: \u201cWorrying does not take away tomorrow\u2019s troubles. It takes away today\u2019s peace.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n

          \n
        1. Stay grounded through social ups and downs\u00a0<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

          Most kids and teens feel lonely at times, experience mean behavior, or feel left out. These moments are uncomfortable but common.\u00a0<\/p>\n

          When my kids were little, their social struggles were difficult for me, too. Luckily, I learned that these situations were opportunities to help kids build skills, confidence, and awareness to navigate relationships in healthy ways.<\/a> Instead of adding my reactions and assumptions to difficulties, I found that staying calm and empathic helped to calm and support my kids.<\/a>\u00a0<\/p>\n

            \n
          1. When their confidence dips, keep your confidence in them strong\u00a0<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

            Most kids experience a dip in confidence at some stage of development. Research finds that girls confidence can dip by 30% <\/a>between the ages of 8 and 13. This dip may cause once confident kids to avoid taking risks, raising their hand in class, or trying something new.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n

            Now, as the mom of an 18-year-old, it is amazing to see my daughter emerge on the other side. Her confidence returned because she started taking risks and believing in herself. This does not happen overnight. Whenever my kids\u2019 confidence dips,<\/a> I\u2019m their biggest cheerleader and use these phrases: I believe in you and you got this<\/a>.<\/p>\n

            Five Parenting Insights & Looking Ahead <\/h2>\n

            As my daughter prepares to walk across the stage and gather her diploma, we are all preparing for the next phase. I imagine it will be filled with laughs, tears, struggles, triumphs, and so much more. She will continue to grow as a person, and I will continue to grow as a parent.\u00a0<\/p>\n

            I hope these five parenting insights are helpful. Feel free to take what is useful and toss the rest. Parenting is not a one-size-fits-all approach. Follow your heart, honor the child you have in front of you, and go easy on yourself. We are all learning as we go.<\/p>\n

            About Jessica Speer:<\/h2>\n

            Jessica Speer is the award-winning author of books for kids and teens, including The Phone Book \u2013 Stay Safe, Be Smart, and Make the World Better with the Powerful Device in Your Hand<\/a><\/strong><\/em>, BFF or NRF (Not Really Friends)? A Girls Guide to Happy Friendships<\/a><\/em><\/strong> and Middle School \u2013 Safety Goggles Advised<\/a><\/em><\/strong>. Blending social science, stories, and activities, her writing unpacks tricky stuff that surfaces during childhood and adolescence. She holds a Master\u2019s Degree in Social Sciences and has a knack for writing about complex topics in a way that connects with kids and teens. Jessica regularly contributes to media outlets on content related to kids, parenting, friendship, and social-emotional learning. For more information, visit www.JessicaSpeer.com<\/a><\/p>\n

            Related<\/em><\/h3>\n<\/p><\/div>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

            This post shares five parenting insights I learned while raising my kids, which prompted my personal growth and made me a better parent. And just like that, my oldest daughter is about to graduate from high school. The past 18 years have been a winding journey of laughs, tears, struggles, triumphs, and so much more. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":7053782,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[145675,145676,167786,190825,11932,145677,115113,115114],"tags":[145679,11253,145680,167787,10844,6921,11254,190827,4677,145681,115117,115115,115116],"dealstore":[],"offerexpiration":[],"class_list":["post-7053780","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-children-4-8","category-friendship-problems","category-healthy-family-communication","category-nurturing-connection","category-parenting","category-social-emotional-skills","category-teens-13","category-tweens-9-12","tag-children-4-8","tag-earlier","tag-friendship-problems","tag-healthy-family-communication","tag-insights","tag-jessica","tag-learned","tag-nurturing-connection","tag-parenting","tag-social-emotional-skills","tag-speer","tag-teens-13","tag-tweens-9-12"],"yoast_head":"\nFive Parenting Insights I Wish I\u2019d Learned Earlier \u2013 Jessica Speer - Som2ny Network<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/fivemor.com\/?p=7053780\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Five Parenting Insights I Wish I\u2019d Learned Earlier \u2013 Jessica Speer - Som2ny Network\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"This post shares five parenting insights I learned while raising my kids, which prompted my personal growth and made me a better parent. 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