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When people said, \u201cYou\u2019ll never sleep again,\u201d we didn\u2019t really know what that meant. But now, as parents, we\u2019re in the thick of it:<\/p>\n
Cluster feeding.<\/p>\n
Sleep regressions.<\/p>\n
Nighttime potty training.<\/p>\n
A 2018 study<\/a> estimates the average parent gets less than 5 hours of sleep per night in the first year. (And it seems like it never ends.) Another study<\/a> found that parents experience less-than-adequate sleep for the first six years of parenthood.\u00a0<\/p>\n That load isn\u2019t shared equally, either. On average, moms lose an extra hour of sleep per night<\/a> compared to dads\u2019 13 minutes of lost slumber.\u00a0<\/p>\n It\u2019s no wonder we\u2019re feeling totally sleep deprived.<\/strong><\/p>\n Sleep deprivation can happen any time we don\u2019t get the sleep we need. After three months, sleep deprivation is considered a chronic problem.<\/p>\n While overall hours certainly matter, the quality of our sleep is even more important. Fragmented sleep, where we\u2019re frequently woken or continue to toss and turn, is particularly damaging. (Sound familiar?)<\/p>\n In the short term\u2013even after a single night without restful sleep\u2013we start to experience negative consequences. Short-term sleep deprivation most commonly causes:<\/p>\n Over time, chronic sleep deprivation side effects get more intense:<\/p>\n Longer healing times after delivery<\/p>\n<\/li>\n Increased risk of contagious illness<\/p>\n<\/li>\n Higher risk of long-term illnesses like cardiovascular disease and diabetes<\/p>\n<\/li>\n Unsafe sleep practices<\/p>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n The link between sleep deprivation and mental health conditions is also incredibly strong,<\/strong> particularly in the early postpartum period. Research shows that poor sleep can increase symptoms of anxiety, depression, and obsessive-compulsive symptoms.<\/p>\n Some days, it can be tough to calm ourselves down for sleep\u2014despite how exhausted we are. Our heads hit the pillow and suddenly we\u2019re wide awake. Whether it\u2019s the unfinished to-do list from today or the upcoming to-do list for tomorrow, our brains keep running on those quickly depleting fumes.\u00a0<\/p>\n Then, we turn to our phones or other screens, hoping to distract and numb our brains into slumberland. Even though we know it\u2019s really counterproductive.\u00a0<\/a><\/p>\n While we can\u2019t control the kid-centric side of sleep (especially in those early weeks), we can choose more productive activities to improve our own sleep<\/a> no matter how much we\u2019re getting these days.\u00a0<\/p>\n These relaxation activities can help!<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n Also called belly breathing, this technique can reduce stress and tension in the body.<\/p>\n While lying on your back, place one hand on your upper chest and the other right below your ribcage. Breathe in through your nose, letting the breath fill your belly. Keep your chest still. Slowly exhale through your mouth.<\/p>\n Even just a few minutes of belly breathing can make us more relaxed and ready for sleep!<\/p>\n Body scans are a type of visualization exercise. When you practice this somatic meditation, you increase a sense of well-being and awareness in your body. This can decrease stress and prepare your body for slumber.<\/p>\n Start by taking a few deep breaths to begin relaxing. Bring attention to your feet, noticing the sensations and tension you\u2019re feeling in that area. If you notice discomfort, acknowledge the feeling. Then, visualize that tension leaving your body through your breath. When you\u2019re ready, move your focus up toward your calves. Repeat the process of noticing and naming any discomfort, then visualize it releasing from your body. Methodically move your attention toward other areas until you\u2019ve scanned your entire body.<\/p>\n It\u2019s harder to be mentally tense when our bodies are relaxed. Progressive muscle relaxation can loosen our muscles, giving our brain a chance to do the same.\u00a0<\/p>\n This is best done with an auditory guide, and you\u2019ll find plenty on YouTube. These meditations will lead you through each muscle group, from your forehead to your toes.\u00a0<\/p>\n Lie down in bed, breathe in and contract each muscle group for 5-10 seconds. Breathe out as you release the tension. Stay relaxed for 10-20 seconds, soaking in the sensations, before moving on to the next muscle group.<\/p>\n If your getting-to-sleep problems are more mental, journaling can be an excellent way to empty your brain so you can finally relax and get some rest! Leave your stress and worries to the paper and pen, not your mind. If you\u2019re not into formal journaling, just keeping a notepad by your bed to empty thoughts as they come can be a helpful strategy.<\/p>\n Getting good sleep is hard. But there\u2019s help available.<\/p>\n My online course Keeping Mommy in Mind<\/a> has an entire module about sleep and how to get more of it. Take back your joy and confidence in motherhood. Start today!<\/a><\/p>\n Remember, this process is tough (to say the least). If you find yourself burning out, you\u2019re not alone. And there\u2019s help available! Bonnet, M. H., & Arand, D. L. (2003). Clinical effects of sleep fragmentation versus sleep deprivation. Sleep medicine reviews, 7(4), 297\u2013310. https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1053\/smrv.2001.0245<\/a>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. (2016, July 15). Sleep Hygiene Tips – Sleep and Sleep Disorders. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. https:\/\/www.cdc.gov\/sleep\/about_sleep\/sleep_hygiene.html<\/a> .\u00a0<\/p>\n Chahine, E. (2021, June 9). Sleep Deprivation and New Parenthood. Sleep Foundation. https:\/\/www.sleepfoundation.org\/sleep-deprivation\/parents<\/a>.\u00a0<\/p>\n Richter, D., Kr\u00e4mer, M. D., Tang, N., Montgomery-Downs, H. E., & Lemola, S. (2019). Long-term effects of pregnancy and childbirth on sleep satisfaction and duration of first-time and experienced mothers and fathers. Sleep, 42(4), zsz015. https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1093\/sleep\/zsz015<\/a><\/p>\n Suni, E. (2020, August 14). What Is Sleep Hygiene? Sleep Foundation.https:\/\/www.sleepfoundation.org\/sleep-hygiene<\/a>.<\/p>\n<\/div>\nWhat is Sleep Deprivation?<\/h2>\n
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4 Sleepy-Time Relaxation Activities<\/h2>\n
#1 Diaphragmatic Breathing<\/strong><\/h3>\n
#2 The Body Scan<\/strong><\/h3>\n
#3 Progressive Muscle Relaxation<\/strong><\/h3>\n
#4 Journaling<\/strong><\/h3>\n
Catch those zzz\u2019s.<\/h2>\n
Check out my course Overcoming Parental Burnout<\/a>, an online resource to help you go from exhausted to supported.<\/p>\n
Sources and Further Reading<\/strong><\/h3>\n