{"id":278047,"date":"2025-06-06T22:56:50","date_gmt":"2025-06-06T22:56:50","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/peraltafinancing.com\/uncategorized\/heroin-for-kids-bizarro\/"},"modified":"2025-06-06T22:56:50","modified_gmt":"2025-06-06T22:56:50","slug":"heroin-for-kids-bizarro","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fivemor.com\/?p=278047","title":{"rendered":"Heroin for Kids \u2014 Bizarro"},"content":{"rendered":"<p> <br \/>\n<br \/><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/images.squarespace-cdn.com\/content\/v1\/5c08178c1137a64a2bef43f2\/1748788411611-4T7U95VWNUGT2GJXOUTF\/Bizarro+06-01-25+hdrWB.png?format=1500w\" \/><\/p>\n<div>\n<p class=\"\" style=\"white-space:pre-wrap;\">Welcome, Jazz Pickle. Thank you for focusing your laser-like consciousness at this point in time and space. It\u2019s only fair to remind you that this decision will change the trajectory of your life, as everything you do does.\u00a0<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" style=\"white-space:pre-wrap;\">In some other dimension you\u2019re not consciously aware of, another version of you may have decided to look at videos of NASCAR crashes or an old episode of <em>Hee Haw<\/em>, and that took your life in a different direction. That version of you may have gone on to believe absurd conspiracies written by agents of an enemy government, and convinced you to vote for a pack of costumed hyenas with an insatiable appetite for everything in your wallet, purse, and bank account. <\/p>\n<p class=\"\" style=\"white-space:pre-wrap;\">But in this dimension, you are here, now. I\u2019ll do my best to ensure that this version of you made the better decision.<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" style=\"white-space:pre-wrap;\"><span style=\"text-decoration:underline\">NOW TO CARTOONS<\/span>: Remember <a href=\"https:\/\/www.google.com\/search?sca_esv=83c01875459cc16f&amp;sxsrf=AE3TifNXr8GYAgYaKeZdaBlIjTWZaIYSnw:1748783367020&amp;q=pez+candy+dispensers&amp;udm=2&amp;fbs=AIIjpHxU7SXXniUZfeShr2fp4giZ1Y6MJ25_tmWITc7uy4KIeioyp3OhN11EY0n5qfq-zEMZldv_eRjZ2XLYc5GnVnMEMfsGce84XZ9Zo0uPR2P9PSZw1Y5qnIViUEbAZVhbvc1XIU1TzAO30Z-69sax_rZoMMVaqwf-Gm_nsOuzTdioNeKNtZvbKLkUn9oinwnvHERmUrckrwpkozpQ3oQv1kCnDXcJ0Q&amp;sa=X&amp;ved=2ahUKEwjjpYXbpdCNAxUnL0QIHRU8AbQQtKgLegQIEhAB&amp;biw=1626&amp;bih=851&amp;dpr=1.8\" target=\"_blank\">PEZ<\/a> candies? They are little tablets of pure sugar, and they come in fun dispensers,  many of which became collectible. PEZ is among the armada of products that are responsible for most of us now bouncing on a diving board above the pool of diabetes, or having already cannonballed into the depths.<\/p>\n<p class=\"\" style=\"white-space:pre-wrap;\">In my youth (everything before ten years ago), I loved those kooky dispensers, and I loved sugar. I still do. <\/p>\n<p class=\"\" style=\"white-space:pre-wrap;\">But now that I\u2019m trying to avoid a daily insulin habit by fighting that sugar monkey on back with every fiber of my being, I\u2019m wondering why some clever capitalist hasn\u2019t invented fun, comic-character syringes to help attract children to heroin. In another dimension, someone probably has. (Maybe RFK Jr. is from that dimension. It would explain a lot.)<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Welcome, Jazz Pickle. Thank you for focusing your laser-like consciousness at this point in time and space. It\u2019s only fair to remind you that this decision will change the trajectory of your life, as everything you do does.\u00a0 In some other dimension you\u2019re not consciously aware of, another version of you may have decided to [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":278048,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[106225,34776,351],"dealstore":[],"offerexpiration":[],"class_list":["post-278047","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-bizarro","tag-heroin","tag-kids"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Heroin for Kids \u2014 Bizarro - Som2ny Network<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/fivemor.com\/?p=278047\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Heroin for Kids \u2014 Bizarro - Som2ny Network\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Welcome, Jazz Pickle. Thank you for focusing your laser-like consciousness at this point in time and space. 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