{"id":180207,"date":"2025-04-10T10:37:43","date_gmt":"2025-04-10T10:37:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/peraltafinancing.com\/business\/legal\/future-faking-building-a-false-reality\/"},"modified":"2025-04-10T10:37:43","modified_gmt":"2025-04-10T10:37:43","slug":"future-faking-building-a-false-reality","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fivemor.com\/?p=180207","title":{"rendered":"Future faking: building a false reality"},"content":{"rendered":"


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You might have been there, sat on your first or second date with someone you really like. They start talking about the future. It could be things like where you\u2019ll go on holiday together, or what sort of pet you should adopt. Sometimes it could be the names of your future children, or where you should buy a house. But then you never hear from them again.<\/p>\n

The expression \u2018future faking\u2019 became popular in the 2010s, specifically in line with the rise of the dating apps. Essentially, it means when someone you\u2019re talking to, or dating, builds you a future full of excitement and promises that they never intend to keep. Shortly afterwards, they then break up with you.<\/p>\n

There are a lot of questions that might follow such an encounter, for example what exactly is the purpose in future faking?<\/p>\n

Generally, it is understood to be a manipulative tactic, often used to get the other person to do something in the short term.<\/p>\n

What are the signs of future faking?<\/strong><\/h2>\n

Signs of future faking can look different depending on the situation you are in. However, common themes are talking about serious things very early on, making promises that seem wild or extravagant, or you seem to be doing a lot for them, with not much action on their part.<\/p>\n

For example:<\/p>\n

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  • Talking about houses, marriage, children etc on in very early dating stages<\/li>\n
  • Wanting to book extravagant holidays\/ planning things but no concrete action<\/li>\n
  • Asking for your opinions on things in their household or similar saying \u2018you\u2019ll be seeing it\/using it a lot\u2019<\/li>\n
  • Planning dates or trips and cancelling last minute or never showing<\/li>\n
  • Inconsistency in their stories<\/li>\n
  • Saying \u201cI love you\u201d early on<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

    Is future faking a form of domestic abuse?<\/strong><\/h2>\n

    Much of the research about future faking discusses it as a form of abuse. Some people refer to it as \u2018love-bombing on steroids\u2019. Love-bombing<\/a> is a tactic used by abusers whereby they shower their partner with affection, gifts, quality time, trips etc as a way to exert coercive control.<\/p>\n

    Future faking can also be used to exploit the person on the receiving end. It can cause emotional harm, as it creates a vision of an idealistic future that is then swiftly removed. This can knock self-confidence and have a long-term impact on trust.<\/p>\n

    It is also often utilised by abusers in more long-term relationships to coercively control<\/a> their victim. Abusive partners will convince victims to stay in the relationship with the promise of whatever they want for their future, whether it be a holiday, a house or children. It keeps the victim hooked on the possibility of an abusive relationship improving or their partner \u2018changing\u2019.<\/p>\n