{"id":104371,"date":"2025-02-23T02:05:41","date_gmt":"2025-02-23T02:05:41","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/peraltafinancing.com\/recipes\/category-a-b\/beer\/things-im-just-not-going-to-do\/"},"modified":"2025-02-23T02:05:41","modified_gmt":"2025-02-23T02:05:41","slug":"things-im-just-not-going-to-do","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fivemor.com\/?p=104371","title":{"rendered":"Things I&#8217;m just not going to do &#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p> <br \/>\n<\/p>\n<div>\n<p>\u2026 in 2023, as a fifty-six year old beer drinker of 40+ years.<\/p>\n<p><strong>1. Use the term, \u201cWest Coast IPA\u201d.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Trying to get people to define what they actually <em>mean<\/em> by this, usually elicits all manner of responses that lack any kind of consensus, or cohesion or clarity. That\u2019s not surprising since there is no such \u2018style\u2019. What used to be simply a phrase to describe an American IPA that was brewed on the West Coast (and perhaps had some typical, dank, piney, big, bruising palate crushing characteristics \u00e0 la Ruination), has come to mean (I think)\u00a0any, \u201cnon-hazy\u201d IPA. Err, we already have a style designation for that, it\u2019s called an American (D)IPA. It\u2019s not hard, stop making shit up.<\/p>\n<p><strong>2. Go to breweries with tap lists like this one.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/dingsbeerblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/Screen-Shot-2023-04-21-at-12.51.08-PM.png\"><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-25202 \" src=\"https:\/\/dingsbeerblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/Screen-Shot-2023-04-21-at-12.51.08-PM.png\" alt=\"Dot &amp; Line Tap List 4\/21\/23\" width=\"678\" height=\"896\"\/><\/a>This is the Tap List of <a href=\"https:\/\/dotandlinebrewing.com\">Dot &amp; Line Brewing<\/a> here in Fort Wayne, IN today, 4\/21\/23. It\u2019s VERY typical of so many breweries that I walk into these days. A seltzer (not beer), two \u201csmoothie sours\u201d (whatever the hell they are, but they\u2019re not beer), two enormous stouts one of which is filled with candy bars, three hazy IPAs that I won\u2019t drink, one wheat beer laden with more fruit, to leave a Cream Ale that I would (and have) drunk, and a 9% Imperial Porter that might drink but there we go again, more adjunct shit. What that boils down to is a single beer out of eleven that I would drink.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m not singling Dot &amp; Line out here, they just happen to provide a great example that is being repeated all over the place. I\u2019ve <a href=\"https:\/\/dingsbeerblog.com\/2021\/06\/30\/from-prints-to-pints\/\">met the brewer<\/a> and he seemed like a sensible bloke, who knows beer, which for me makes that list all the more tragic. The reason I\u2019m aware of Dot &amp; Line\u2019s list is that I check it regularly since they are local to me, and in the hope that I might see something that doesn\u2019t look like that \u2013 so far that\u2019s been pretty much in vain, although they do make a nice Vienna lager which is HUGELY welcome. Why not more, simple, traditional, relatively low ABV styles on a regular basis? Why not stouts and porters with no shit in them? Or why not three beers out of eleven that I might want as a <a href=\"https:\/\/dingsbeerblog.com\/2021\/12\/31\/legacy-beer-drinkers-made-sad\/\">legacy drinker<\/a>?<\/p>\n<p><strong>3. Refer to fake (kettle) \u2018sours\u2019, as sours.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>If you brew an <em>actual<\/em> Gueuze, Flanders Red, Oud Bruin, Gose, \u2018Lambic\u2019 or a Berliner Weiss and you don\u2019t add fruit, then I\u2019m in. If you make molten sour patch kids, then just stand up and call them what they are, candy based beverages for children, and don\u2019t insult Europe\u2019s great tradition of brewing real sour beer.<\/p>\n<p><strong>4. Drink Hazy \u2018IPAs\u2019, beers with chunks or glitter, fake sours (see above) or melted candy bars masquerading as \u2018stouts\u2019.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>For much of my drinking life I\u2019ve pretty much lived by the the mantra <em>that I\u2019ll drink any beer at least once<\/em>. That was true for years and years and years. I always felt it gave my criticisms more gravitas, and showed that I was well-rounded in terms of my experience. However, beer that looks like orange juice is a singularly unappealing optic to me, and the soft, squidgy nature of New England IPAs mean they just don\u2019t taste like beer to me. As a result I\u2019ve long since changed my original philosophy on drinking anything once, and I\u2019m not going to drink \u2018beer\u2019 that I think is shit.<\/p>\n<p><strong>5. Embrace cans.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I hate them. They are inelegant, often suffer from under carboation in several styles, and remove the sheer beauty, majesty and sophistication of something corked &amp; caged in 750 or 375 mL. I\u2019m 100% uninterested in environmental, packaging and transporting concerns, arguments or issues.<\/p>\n<p><strong>6. Pay Tavour, $6.99 for 16oz of a simple beer (Pilsner, Brown Ale, Pale Ale etc.) from a brewery that\u2019s 10 minutes old.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/dingsbeerblog.com\/2021\/07\/11\/the-tavour-myth-machine\/\">I\u2019ve written about this before<\/a> and this phenomenon is totally nuts. I really, really want to support new breweries, and I am willing to take a chance and buy beer from them, but there is ZERO chance of me doing so if you\u2019re offering me the equivalent of $31.46 a six pack, PLUS shipping, from a TOTALLY unproven brewery, when at the beer store I can get <a href=\"https:\/\/www.totalwine.com\/beer\/lager\/czech-pilsner\/pilsner-urquell\/p\/3406126\">66 oz of Pilsner Urquell for around $10<\/a>. How does <em>any<\/em> other decision compute for a person that knows anything about beer? I\u2019m dumbfounded.<\/p>\n<p><strong>7. Allow people to use the word \u2018lager\u2019 without specificity.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>The silly bandwagon hype over lagers has been bugging me a while now, but when a bartender says to me, \u201cWould you like a lager?\u201d I just about lose my shit. My response is curt, and usually goes something like, \u201cI dunno, is it a Doppelbock or is it an American Adjunct?\u201d How can you be lumping these things together in one sentence? It\u2019s dumb; do better, and until you do I\u2019m going to call you on it.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u2026 in 2023, as a fifty-six year old beer drinker of 40+ years. 1. Use the term, \u201cWest Coast IPA\u201d. Trying to get people to define what they actually mean by this, usually elicits all manner of responses that lack any kind of consensus, or cohesion or clarity. That\u2019s not surprising since there is no [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":104372,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[137],"tags":[47968],"dealstore":[],"offerexpiration":[],"class_list":["post-104371","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-beer","tag-dot-line"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Things I&#039;m just not going to do ... - Som2ny Network<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/fivemor.com\/?p=104371\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Things I&#039;m just not going to do ... - Som2ny Network\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"\u2026 in 2023, as a fifty-six year old beer drinker of 40+ years. 1. 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